Abigail made her way back up to the dressing rooms and felt alone and depressed when Kevin didn’t even notice that she had wandered off. She sat down quietly in the corner, as she thought about the two pills that were now in her pocket. She had no idea what they were and under any other circumstances she wouldn’t even consider taking something that a stranger had given her, but all she wanted was to feel normal again. She hated the panic attacks, mood swings and depression she had been feeling the over past couple of days. She quietly walked past Kevin and got a bottle of water. He smiled at her and called her over. “You’re kind of quiet tonight. Are you feeling all right?” Kevin asked, as he took a hold of Abigail’s hand.

“I’m fine. Just tired.” Abigail replied quietly.

“Why don’t you lie down? We’ll be hitting the stage soon, so it will be quiet in here for a little while. You might be able to take a quick nap.” Kevin suggested.

“Maybe I will.” Abigail said as she walked towards the couch and lay down. She would wait until the guys were on stage to take the pill, because she didn’t want Kevin suspecting anything. He probably all ready thought she was crazy enough without knowing she was considering taking something a stranger gave her.

A few minutes later, Kevin came over to Abigail and said, “Are you going to be all right in here by yourself?”

“Yeah. I think I am going to try and get some sleep. I don’t know why, but I’m just so tired tonight. Maybe I’ll come out a little later and watch some of the show.” Abigail said wishing she could ask Kevin to stay with her or at least have the courage to give him the pills, but she was afraid of what Kevin would think.

“Ok sweetie. See you after the show.” Kevin said as he lightly kissed Abigail on the lips. She looked so vulnerable as she lay on the couch, but he had to believe that she would be all right for the two hours a day he had to leave her side.

As soon as Kevin had left the room, Abigail removed the small white pills from her pocket and simply stared at them. She had every intention of just throwing them away, but the two conflicting voices in her head returned.  One was telling her to take the pill because it would make her feel better and make Kevin stop worrying about her. The voice of reason was telling her to throw them away and trust Kevin and Dr Steep. Unfortunately, the need to be in control took over and she quickly swallowed one of the pills. She would try it just once to see if it helped; if it worked she’d be able to return to her normal life. Now that the she had silenced the voices, she felt more at ease and was able to drift off to sleep.

Two hours later when the boys had completed the show, Kevin was concerned when Carlos confirmed that he hadn’t seen Abigail at all during the show. He quickly ran to the dressing room and was relieved to find Abigail asleep on the same couch he left her on. ‘She must have been really tired.’ Kevin said to himself as he crouched down in front of the couch to wake Abigail up. “Abigail, it’s time to go back to the hotel.” Kevin said as he gently caressed her cheek. She looked so beautiful when she was asleep and he hated to wake her.

Abigail slowly came around when she heard Kevin telling her it was time to go. She slowly opened her eyes and became confused when she couldn’t focus on anything. She reached out for the blurry figure in front of her.

Kevin noticed that Abigail’s pupils were fully dilated, but just assumed that her eyes were having difficulties adjusting to the bright lights in the dressing room. “I know you’re tired Abi. But I need you to get up so we can get out to the van. We’ll go straight to bed when we get back to the hotel.” Kevin said as he helped Abigail sit up.

Abigail’s vision became a little clearer as she sat up, so with Kevin’s assistance she was able to stand up and make it out to the van. She simply rested her head against Kevin’s shoulder and willed the dizziness to go away. Before she knew it, Kevin was helping her out of the van and she didn’t even realize that she was rode the elevator without having a panic attack. She let Kevin guide her into the room and undress her before he tucked her into bed. This wasn’t too bad Abigail thought to herself.

Kevin thought it was a little strange that Abigail seemed so out of it, but he would let it go for the night especially if it meant she would get a good night sleep. He quietly moved around the room trying to pack their things as quickly as possible since they were scheduled to depart at nine the following morning. As soon as he had everything packed he took a quick shower and then crawled into bed beside Abigail. She quietly shifted in her sleep and Kevin was happy to have her safe in his arms.

Part way throughout the night, Kevin was startled out of a sound sleep when Abigail sat straight up in bed and screamed on the top of her lungs. He quickly gathered Abigail in his arms and tried to calm her down, but it didn’t appear to be working.  He couldn’t figure out exactly what she kept repeating, but he thought it sounded like, “What have I done?” Just when it seemed like Abigail was beginning to calm down, she quickly moved off the bed and ran towards the bathroom. Before Kevin could make it to her side, he heard her being violently ill. Maybe she was just coming down with the flu, Kevin thought to himself as he tried to comfort Abigail as she continued to be sick.

Abigail was terrified as she sat on the frigid bathroom floor and continued to be sick. She desperately wanted to tell Kevin what was wrong, but she was terrified that Kevin would become angry. In the end she decided it was best to keep it to her self.

Half an hour later, Kevin picked Abigail up off the bathroom floor and carried her limp body back to bed. He thought they would finally be able to get some sleep as he held Abigail’s trembling body.

Abigail was even more terrified as she lay in bed with Kevin. If she had any idea the pill was going to make her so sick, she would have never taken it. He promised her that it would make her feel better, not worse.

Abigail felt herself loosing focus again, and knew it was time to tell Kevin. She quickly got out of bed and started looking for her jeans and she started to panic when she couldn’t find them. “Where are my jeans?” Abigail asked as she frantically searched the room.

“Abi, it’s three o’ clock in the morning for crying out loud. You don’t need your jeans right now.” Kevin said as he tried to guide Abigail back to bed.

“I need to show you something.” Abigail said as she tried to pull away from Kevin.

“I’m sure it can wait until the morning.” Kevin said, slowly loosing his patience. He was tired and just wanted to sleep.

“No Kevin. I took something. I need to show you what I took.” Abigail struggled to say. She had to tell Kevin what she did before it was too late. She was loosing track of everything that she was feeling.

“What do you mean you took something? What was it?” Kevin asked as he grabbed Abigail by the shoulders, forcing her to look at him.

“I don’t know what it was.” Abigail said as she collapsed on the bed and began to cry. This was turning into her worst nightmare. She felt like she was dying and Kevin was upset with her.

Kevin quickly opened Abigail’s suitcase and found the jeans she had been wearing that day. He felt his stomach cramp when he located the small white pill in her pocket and knew that it wasn’t her prescription medicine. Kevin picked up the phone and immediately called Carlos’s room without saying a word to Abigail. When Carlos answered the phone, Kevin said nervously, “I need you in my room now.”

Carlos was in the room in less than one minute and he could tell something was seriously wrong when he saw Abigail’s flushed skin and Kevin’s pale face. “Do you need me to call a doctor?” Carlos asked, taking control of the situation.

Kevin held out his hand with the small while pill sitting in the middle of his palm and asked in a weak voice, “Do you have any idea what this is?”

“Kevin, where in the hell did you get this?” Carlos asked as he removed the pill from Kevin’s hand. He’d seen enough drugs during his days as a security guard and he didn’t like what he saw.

“I think Abigail took one.” Kevin said as they watched Abigail rock back and forth on the bed.

“Jesus Kevin. Where in the hell did she find this shit?” Carlos asked. He was certain that no one on the tour was involved with drugs.

“I don’t know. What the hell is it?” Kevin asked reluctantly, not sure that he wanted to hear the answer.

“It’s been a while since I’ve seen this shit, but it looks like Ecstasy to me.” Carlos said.

“Jesus Christ! Where in the hell did she get this? What do I do?” Kevin asked in a panic.

“It’s probably best if we get her to the hospital. There’s no telling how someone is going to react to this stuff.” Carlos tried to say calmly.

For the second time in a month, Kevin watched Abigail being loaded into an ambulance. He wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take. He was starting to get the idea that Abigail needed more help than he was capable of giving her and decided he would have to have a serious discussion with Dr. Steep about the best way to proceed with her treatment. He felt helpless as the paramedics checked her vital signs for any signs of complications. All Kevin could do was pray to God that he would see Abigail through yet another ordeal.